This post is going to be disjointed, incoherent, and meandering. So if you can't get through and wish to skip it do so, I'll never know.

Memories have been on my mind a lot lately. Today, with the passing of a friend, there is fear mixed in with those memories. I have finally come to the conclusion that a major part of the reason that I dislike change so much is because what it is doing to my memories.

When I drive through the streets of this area that I have lived in nearly all my life there are days when the changes are so profound that there is a clutching around my heart as I try to remember what used to be.  After all aren't memories made mostly of scenes from the past and the happy feelings that those scenes evoke.  Yet those scenes are being removed from my world and those who peopled them are being taken as well. 

There is, however, a deep consolation and a profound feeling of gain as well when I think of those who have gone from this life.  The lessons learned and the love given and received are both with me and always will be no matter who has passed or what buildings have been razed.

This friend who has passed never knew what gifts he gave to me in the time that I knew him. (mores the pity and what a selfish friend I was in return)  He taught me that I am me and there is no need or reason to be anyone else.  He showed me that we all have faults, it is how we fight them that matters.  He lived a deep and lively faith in God and loyalty to The Church of Christ and a deep and loving devotion to The Blessed Mother.  Most importantly he taught that family is all and it is through them that you hand on the lessons of life lived and faith grown and nothing else really matters. 

So here I sit with both pain and joy in my heart and a fervent prayer in my mind.  Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him. May his soul and the souls of all the faithful departed rest in peace.